WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU FEEL JUDGED (IT’S PROBABLY NOT WHAT YOU THINK!)


Recently one of my friends called me for advice.  She said that she was feeling judged by someone at work.  She didn’t know what to do about it.  Her first instinct was to fight back in some way.  She wanted to defend herself to the person who was judging her.

My response surprised her.

I said, “Don’t defend yourself.  Don’t fight back.  Don’t judge back.”

I let that sink in for a minute, and then I added, “The moment that you feel judged and attacked, your work is to immediately do something to make somebody else feel loved.”

Let me say that again: When you feel judged, make someone else feel loved.

When you feel as though someone has attacked you, judged you or done anything to make you feel inadequate or unlovable, do the opposite.  Go and do something to make other people feel good.  Make somebody feel lovable, adequate and good enough.

Here are some things you can do when you feel judged:

  • Call or text a friend and let them know how grateful you are for their friendship and how awesome they are.
  • Send flowers to someone you care about.
  • Email a coworker and thank them for doing a great job.
  • Post an inspirational message on social media.
  • Cook your family their favorite meal.
  • Reply to people’s Instagram stories or comment on their photos with genuine and enthusiastic compliments.
  • Pray for other people to feel loved and confident.

This simple action can change everything for you.  It’s the fastest way to stop the momentum of the negative energy and feel better right away.

Not fighting back doesn’t mean not standing up for yourself. But the key is to take spiritually aligned action.  This way you can show up from a place of true power and speak up with love instead of hate.

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